Another Side Effect of Vaccines

I was seeing a charming little one-year-old girl who had two older sisters and a mother who is so cool she didn't even realize just how cool she is.

I enjoy chatting with this lady because her humor is just as dry as mine. She can also keep a straight face almost as long as I can, which is good, because one thing I tell people when they have children is this:

The hardest part of being a parent is keeping a straight face.

We did the checkup, and then the baby needed two shots.

Although the mom is a smart health professional, she still asked for some last minute reassurance that the shots didn't cause autism. I gave it. She was fine.

(This is how most of my "anti-vax" encounters go, by the way. Very few people are as hard-core crazee as the commenters on assorted posts about vaccines, and are easily reassured with information that the incidence of autism hasn't decreased since the removal of mercury from childhood vaccines for the last five year.)

She had one more question:

Mom: Will she cry?
Me: No.

Held the straight face too. And the baby did great; just a little whimper with the first, and only as I was done with the second did the wailing began. I pointed out that it was the mom's fault for holding her too tightly. That's why she was crying; not my fault.

Within a minute she was back in the waiting room playing with her sisters, while Mom and I kept chatting. We were enjoying our conversation so much that it took us a moment to realize the baby had wandered into the bathroom and was starting to play with the toilet water. As Mom scooped her up to wash her hands, she mock-scolded me:

See? She never did this before getting those shots. This is all your fault.

What could I say? Her point was valid. Gd help me at the fifteen month visit: I wonder what I'll get blamed for then?