Laughing My Ass Off

Caution: contains more personal disclosures (as if anyone cares.)

Although I am in the Philadelphia sports sphere, I am not originally from here. And whatever happens through the years, no one and nothing can ever stop me from holding the Washington Redskins first in my heart. Not even a son born within the city limits of Philadelphia -- just barely -- who now bleeds Eagles green. Although the poor dear is stuck at college in Steelers' country, he's home for Fall break and got to watch the Eagles play in Tampa this afternoon.

He was very quiet for the first half, watching Ronde Barber run two interceptions back for Tampa TDs. Silence reigned from the other end of the couch for a Matt Bryant field goal (30 yards; his longest for the season so far had been 28 yards.) Not a peep from him at the half (17-0 Tampa.)

The second half was better for him. Two Eagle touchdowns evoked loud cheering. A long fourth quarter Tampa drive ended in a field goal (44 yards.) With less than 3 minutes to go, the Eagles went back to work; marching the ball down the field. Finally Brian Westbrook broke five tackles and stepped daintily into the end zone.

"I love that guy!" shreiked my kid.

David Akers' extra point gave the Eagles the first lead of the game with 33 seconds to go, and the boy was going nuts. The kickoff return took six seconds. Five plays and twenty yards later, there were 4 seconds left and the Bucs were going for a 62 yard field goal.

"The NFL record for the longest field goal is 62 yards," proclaimed the TV announcer.

"63, genius!" he shreiked. "Jason Elam for the Broncos and Tom Dempsey for the Saints." How does he keep track of this shit? "They're basically conceding the game," he chortled with glee.

The snap. The kick.

Good.

Two weeks in a row Donovan McNabb and my son have to watch the Eagles lose the game on a last second field goal. The only sound in the room was my hysterical laughter.

(Now I get to watch my Redskins play the Colts. I suppose we'll get to see who laughs last.)
(Monday morning edit: he is.)