FOAD #1

What it lacks in subtlety you must admit it makes up for with enthusiasm.

Seriously, though, I'm worried about this writer. Keeping all your emotions bundled up inside like that can be very bad for you. She should learn to express what she really feels:

(This is an actual conversation I had with a mail-order drug company when they continued to screw up a patient‘s RX's, despite my best efforts to correctly follow all their procedures.)

Me, politely: You know, it’s been 3 weeks without their prescriptions--when you promised 10 days. The patient is getting frustrated with your company…

Sarcastic drug company rep: I don’t talk to road nurses. I talk to doctors. Get HIM to call me. And if your patient doesn’t like our services, they are more than welcome to get their meds at the local pharmacy.

Me (less polite): Oh really? Let me talk to your supervisor, please...

Me to Supervisor (and I'm not polite anymore): I am a road nurse. And about your guy's crack that the patient is “welcome to use the local pharmacy.” Listen, we are the road nurses who actually FILL OUT your damn forms for half-blind, confused, forgetful elderly patients who can’t do it for themselves. Theyrely on ME--yes, ME-- to help them buy zillions of dollars of drugs from your stupid company per year. Guess what will happen if I get mad at you? I will advise every last one of those patients to switch their Rx's to another one of the MYRIAD of mail-order drug companies---you get the picture, bud? In fact, how about if I tell every fucking patient within a 100-mile radius NOT TO USE YOU for whatever reason? Because, believe me, baby, I'll fucking do it. Not only that, but I will tell all my other road nurse buddies to do the same damn thing with their patients in this city, Austin, Dallas, and Houston--do you get the picture, baby? Hell, I'm having PMS--I'll put it on my fucking BLOG! Because believe me, baby--I’ve got BETTER FUCKING THINGS TO DO WITH MY FRIDAY AFTERNOON THAN LISTEN TO ONE OF YOUR DUMB ASS REPS advise me to “use a local pharmacy“---because that can be arranged!!! Have I made myself perfectly crystal clear?

Supervisor: What was the name of the rep who said that to you?...