Musings of a Dinosaur

A Family Doctor in solo private practice; I may be going the way of the dinosaur, but I'm not dead yet.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

FOAD #30

That was my favorite store:

Dear Mr. Customer:

Thank you for taking the time to contact us regarding a policy change that you were not made aware of. This change was made January 14, 2002. In the months prior to this change, we posted signage in our stores and mailed out 10,000 flyers to our regular customers. As you have assured us that you’ve been a long-time loyal customer, the flyer we mailed to your home must have gone astray. We apologize for the inconvenience this has caused.

We made this policy change to help decrease profit losses. We understand you are not concerned with our profit margins; however, profit directly impacts our ability to serve our customers, buy quality merchandise, pay employees and maintain our stores.

We regret that this policy change has made it impossible for you to do business with us in the future and we are sorry to lose you as a customer. You are certainly within your constitutional rights to take your business elsewhere; we would however like to alert you that the company you specifically mentioned, Competition Industries, went out of business January 2001.

Again, we apologize for any inconvenience this has caused.

Thank you,
Fictitious Industries

1 Comments:

At Tue Feb 06, 10:03:00 PM, Anonymous A Naughty Miss said...

Last paragraph -- lmao

Favorite word to use in FOAD letters to "deserving" customers: REGRET

 

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