Musings of a Dinosaur

A Family Doctor in solo private practice; I may be going the way of the dinosaur, but I'm not dead yet.

Friday, February 02, 2007


Not sent certified, return receipt requested? How about a 30 day window for emergencies? I should be a vet. (PLEASE read the PS before flaming me about vets)

Dear Ms. X,

While we do sympathize with the escalating costs of medications, we are unable to sell expensive medications at a discount. As you can see from the enclosed print-out, our price is lower than what charges. Once a medication leaves our facility, we are unable to take returns, as federal law prohibits the resale of previously dispensed items, and considers them misbranded, adulterated, and unfit for use, even if unopened. Surely you would not like returned medications prescribed for your own pets.

I’m sorry we are unable to meet your expectations for veterinary care for your pets. As of today, we will no longer provide any veterinary services to you or your pets, nor will we sell you any products or medications. Please let us know where you would like us to fax your pets’ medical records.


Note: This letter was actually sent to a client.

PS Yes yes yes; I know it's much harder to be a vet than a doctor; fewer schools, therefore fewer training slots; multiple species; and you still have to deal with crazy people.


At Fri Feb 02, 03:51:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

When my mother was in private practice, she had a similar letter she'd send out to patients who pissed her off or were nasty to the front office. It went something like: "We feel you'd be happier somewhere else. Where would you like your records sent?" She referred to it exclusively as the "Yoyo MF Letter." Short for You're on Your Own, Mother F***er."


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